Question and answer
Negative behaviors on the part of the toddler which tax the patience of adults may be a sign of: A. hostility to parents and caregivers. B. an emerging sense of autonomy. C. having been
overindulged. D. insecurity and fear that requires evaluation.
My biological mother contacted me and was searching for me. We met for coffee at a local coffee house. [ I wanted to make sure she knew I had had a good life and wasn't left always wondering what became of me. [ [ To be honest I didn't really feel much of a bond with her, but to be fair I wasn't interested in a relationship with her. We met, talked, it was nice, but not world changing or
anything. I told her all about my childhood and a bit about my life as an adult. She told me about her life, her reasons for deciding to relinquish me for adoption (she was not coerced) and about her life since then. She provided me with an updated medical history and let me know she was still good friends with my biological father. I let her know that she was welcome to let him know how to contact me, in case he wanted a meeting as well, but that I wasn't looking for a relationship. She also told me that she had married after college (she decided to relinquish because she was a teenage and wanted to be able to go off to college and wasn't ready to parent) and had several children. I chose not to share that I had children but I did share all about my childhood and college past and about my family and parents. It was rather like meeting a stranger in public somewhere and having a pleasant conversation. I was thankful to be able to give her at least a bit of closure and she respected that I wasn't really interested in a relationship. We exchanged e-mail addresses because her children wanted contact and I've received messages from her children, also adults and young adults. They've seemed a bit disappointed that I'm not interested in a reunion but they were very nice and respectful of my boundaries, simply letting me know if I even changed my mind I was welcome to contact them. Overall not much came of it, but I got what I wanted out of it...to thank her for the selfless decision she made, let her know that I'd had a good life and never felt abandoned or unwanted and hopefully alleviate any guilt she might have been carrying. ] ] ]
Expert answered|icecream00|Points 20|
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Asked 1/21/2013 2:34:18 AM
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